Finding a balance between too much and too little has always been a task for me. But how do I successfully locate it when my map is showing me suggested roads that often lead me to make complex loops that take me back to where I was before? One road says if I should go explore and spend less time with just one person, I won’t feel so clingy. How do I explain that exploring without the person you’re in love with isn't appealing to me?
Even when I choose that road, I take detours where I’m watching the sunset while I talk to my distant lover. Lying underneath the setting sky I’m left wondering wasn't I supposed to not call so much?
Eventually I end up back at the start with the same confused disposition.
This journey is so unfamiliar and sometimes that gets frustrating.
This is not for the faint of heart, for the weak, for the easily manipulated, or for the unreasonably sensitive. We are not those people.
Finding a balance is important in life and in love. We have to find our equilibrium, our homeostasis, our sweet spot, our holy grail. It takes people lifetimes to find theirs. Some don’t even find it. I have faith in us.
Am I upset that we aren't there yet? No. So we’re stumbling in the dark, feeling around for our place. So the suggested roads sometimes lead us to dead ends, forks, and more loops. So what? That’s what growing love is. Nothing worth it is ever supposed to come that easy.